The Christmas Caper
by Deana
Summary: Aramis plans to bring toys to the local orphanage for Christmas, but trouble interferes in a ridiculous way. (Part of my modern AU and my entry for the December 'Fete des Mousquetaires' contest!)


**The Christmas Caper**  
By Deana

This is my entry in the December 'Fete des Mousquetaires' contest and it's dedicated to Snow-glory, who gave me the plot idea!

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"Wow."

D'Artagnan stood in the doorway of the NYPD basement, speechless with awe. Aramis had organized a Christmas toy donation for the local orphanage, and from the looks of it, he'd _more_ than succeeded.

"What do you think?"

D'Artagnan turned to see Aramis walking up behind him. "We're bringing _all_ of these to the orphanage?!"

Aramis smiled as he took-in the sight. "Indeed we are! The truck should arrive any minute."

D'Artagnan walked over to the piles of toys, spotting a box of familiar-looking gray plushies. He smiled as he lifted one out. "A box of Pusheens. Gee, I wonder who donated _these_?"

Aramis chuckled. "I had to add my own personal touch!"

More footsteps sounded, and Porthos and Athos appeared behind them. "Aramis, have I told you lately how insane you are?" Porthos asked, as he looked at the toys.

"The most recent time was three days ago," Aramis replied, before sticking his hand inside his jacket and pulling something out, which he promptly plopped onto Athos' head.

"You're insane," Athos remarked.

"You'll have to think up another phrase," said Aramis, smiling at the sight of the Santa hat that now adorned Athos. "Porthos just called me that."

"You're a _lunatic_ , then," said Athos, taking it off.

"Same thing!" said Aramis, handing d'Artagnan and Porthos each a hat. "You have to wear it, Athos! It'll look stupid if three of us are wearing one and _you_ aren't!"

Athos sighed and stuffed it inside his jacket.

Ten minutes later, the truck came and the toys were loaded inside. When they were finished, Aramis remained in the back of the truck checking to make sure everything was stable and nothing could fall and break, and didn't expect it when someone suddenly slammed the overhead door shut.

Aramis was startled at the loud sound and turned around. "Very funny, Porthos!" he shouted. As he headed over to the door to open it, the truck suddenly started up and pulled away so abruptly that Aramis was throw forward where he fell to his hands and knees. "Hey!" he shouted.

The truck suddenly careened around a corner and Aramis fell sideways, sliding to the left and hitting the wall. "Hey!" he shouted again. "Stop the truck!"

Whoever had obviously stolen the truck was driving like a maniac. Aramis tried to get his cell phone out of his pocket, but another fast turn sent it falling out of his hands. He rolled towards the other side of the truck, and threw his arms over his head when a basketball bounced right in front of his nose.

It quickly became obvious by the crazy driving that Aramis would have to remain on the floor and wait until the truck stopped to find his phone, which was nowhere in sight. He realized that he didn't have his gun with him, having decided not to take it with him to the orphanage. The toy thief probably didn't realize that someone was inside, and Aramis hoped that _he_ didn't have a gun, either.

The theme to 'Bad Boys' suddenly filled the air, showing Aramis that Porthos had noticed that he and the truck had vanished, and was calling to find out where he was. He lifted his head to see if he could spot his phone, but the truck suddenly went around another corner and he was sent rolling again.

The loud blaring of a car horn suddenly startled Aramis, and he closed his eyes in frightened anticipation of a painful crash. Nothing happened, and he reopened his eyes with a relieved sigh, only to roll again when the truck came to an abrupt halt. He crashed into the piles of toys, and it was a few seconds before he could get up.

Taking a deep breath, Aramis headed over to the door. Just as he bent down to grab the handle and pull it up, it suddenly shot up by itself. A sudden pain and flash of light were all that Aramis saw before darkness took over.

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Aramis had woken with a headache many, many times through his lifetime…especially after being knocked out by a perpetrator. Therefore, his first thought was always, _who hit me?_

"I did."

Aramis blinked his eyes open, and found himself tied up on the floor of the truck. Had he voiced his thoughts? "May I ask why?" he mumbled.

"I need one of these toys."

Aramis continued to blink, trying to roll over to see his assailant, who was digging through the toys. "What?"

"I need that new mechanical dinosaur," said the man. "For my son."

Aramis couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Are you telling me that you _stole_ a truck full of toys from the _police station_ because you need a certain toy that you can't even be sure that we _have_ in here?!" He succeeded in rolling over with a wince. "And you abducted and _assaulted_ a _cop_!"

The guy turned around to glance at him. "That was an accident! When I flung the door up, the handle clipped you on the head. I'm sorry about that."

Aramis still couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You willingly chose jail time for a toy that you won't even be able to give to your kid on Christmas because oh, you'll be in jail!"

"Aha!" the guy exclaimed, before picking up a box. "I _knew_ you had one! The girl at the toy store told me that she donated their last one to you." He shoved it under his arm and started heading out.

Aramis suddenly realized that he was tightly bound with several jump ropes. He painfully struggled to get free, but the man had trussed him up like a Thanksgiving turkey.

"Sorry again," said the man. "But my kid has been screaming for this toy and I felt like Arnold Schwarzenegger in the movie 'Jingle All the Way'! You've seen that, right? Where he goes insane trying to find the toy that his kid wants? Good movie. Anyway, I'm sure your cop friends will find you soon…your phone rang eight times in the few minutes that you were knocked out. I had to remove the battery to get it to stop, but I figure they tracked your phone long enough to get your general location before I did. Merry Christmas!"

Aramis watched in shock as the man jumped out of the truck and ran off. With difficulty, Aramis managed to get himself sitting upright and remained where he was, tied up and alone. He knew exactly where he was by the scenery outside the truck, and it was not on a main road. If they _hadn't_ gotten a fix on his location before his phone went dead, then he probably _wouldn't_ be found very soon. "Is this really happening?" he asked himself aloud. "I'm sitting tied up in the back of a truck full of toys hoping that the others know where I am? For _real_?!"

No sirens filled the air, no sounds of speeding police cars…nothing but silence.

Aramis struggled within his bonds again, pointlessly. "I'm…supposed to…be somewhere…right now…!" The jump ropes were tied too tightly and were digging into every bruise that he'd acquired during his wild ride, so he stopped again, breathing heavily as he accepted that he had no choice but to sit there and wait in the cold.

Ten minutes later, he suddenly heard cars approaching, and Treville's SUV pulled up right within view.

"Finally!" Aramis exclaimed, as his friends got out of the truck and ran over.

"Are you all right?!" Porthos exclaimed as he jumped inside.

"I'm fine."

"Who did this to you?" Treville asked.

Aramis sighed as Porthos worked on freeing him. "I have no idea. Some nut who wanted a certain toy for his kid."

"Did he find one?" d'Artagnan asked.

"Yes."

Athos reached out to turn Aramis' face. "What did he hit you with? Were you unconscious?"

"Only for a few minutes," he replied, with a wince when Athos touched the bump on his forehead. "After the truck stopped and I went to grab the handle, he opened it from the outside and the handle hit me on the way up."

"Should I call for an ambulance?" d'Artagnan asked Treville.

"What? Why?" said Aramis. The jump ropes suddenly fell away as Porthos succeeded in cutting them off. "I don't have a concussion, and we need to go to the orphanage."

"Does your head hurt?" Porthos asked.

"Of course it does," said Aramis. "But it's not bad. Let's go."

Everyone swung their eyes towards their captain.

"Only if we pay Dr. Harris a visit on the way," said Treville.

Aramis rolled his eyes. "Fine." The motion hurt his head and he couldn't stop himself from wincing.

A half-hour later, they were leaving the hospital with relief that Aramis was correct; he didn't have a concussion. Dr. Harris told Aramis that he still should rest, but nothing was going to stop him from delivering the toys. He swallowed some painkillers from the first aid kit in Treville's SUV, and they headed to the orphanage.

The other detectives quickly understood why Aramis was so driven to do his good deed; when they walked in the door, dozens of children came running, practically jumping on top of Aramis. It was overwhelming at first, until the orphanage workers commanded them to calm down. It took a few minutes, but they did…or _tried_ to, at least.

Giving out the toys was one of the most enjoyable things that they'd ever done. Even Athos was caught smiling a few times. The whole affair was tiring, but the joy on the children's faces made it worth it.

"Here."

Aramis looked up from his chair to see a cup before his eyes. He realized that he'd been rubbing his forehead, and he took it and found it full of cocoa.

"How's your head?" Porthos asked.

"Could be worse," Aramis replied, sipping the delicious drink.

"Oh man, look at Athos!" Porthos suddenly said.

They watched as a little girl held up her doll to their older friend, probably asking how some function worked. After a slight hesitation, Athos took it and knelt on one knee, turning the doll around in his hands as he tried to figure something out.

Porthos took out his phone. "For future blackmailing purposes!" he said, turning on the video camera.

Aramis chuckled. Athos was wearing the Santa hat at Aramis' insistence…if he knew that he was being filmed, Porthos would surely live to regret it.

It took a minute, but Athos figured out whatever the girl was trying to do and showed her how. In response, the child threw her arms around his neck and hugged him before skipping off.

Athos remained where he was for a moment, shocked speechless at her sweet show of thanks.

Porthos made an excited sound as his camera continued to record the incident. "He's gonna kill me if he ever sees this!"

"Oh yes," Aramis agreed.

Eventually, it came time to leave so the five detectives did, picking up Chinese takeout and heading to Aramis' apartment.

"That was a good thing that you did for these kids," said Treville.

Aramis smiled as he sat on the couch. "We _all_ did it. Thanks for the help."

"And for the rescue!" said Porthos.

Aramis shook his aching head, still unable to believe what had happened. "Yeah, that too."

Food was passed out and they all settled in front of the TV. D'Artagnan ended up with the remote and he flipped through the channels, in time to find 'Jingle All the Way' just starting. "Oh yeah!" he exclaimed. "Perfect!"

Aramis made a sound of shock, remembering what the crazy thief had said to him.

"Something wrong?" Athos asked.

Aramis couldn't stop himself from chuckling. "No," he said. "Nothing at all!"

THE END


End file.
